The Year of the Dragon...I Pray...

LesbosOnTheCouch by Beth C, one of the Lesbos

(please forgive me if I have misunderstood any that I have aligned with)

Two thousand and eleven, it is, it was and now it is not. Time is here and not here all the same. The Chinese year, this year, 2011, was the year of the rabbit…2011, over and gone. Two thousand and twelve, it is the year of the dragon.

Rabbit, as defined by Webster's on line dictionary- any of various lagomorphs that are born furless, blind, and helpless, that are sometimes gregarious, and that include especially the cottontails of the New World and a small Old World mammal (Oryctolagus cuniculus) that is the source of various domestic breeds.   

Rabbits are herbivores that reingest their own droppings. Rabbits are soft and cuddly. Rabbits might be quick and energetic – but they are prey animals and so fearful and quite helpless in the face of danger.

This year is a year of strength…The year of the Dragon, two thousand and twelve seems to already hold more promise. A dragon, dragons are strong fearless creatures.

Dragon, as defined by Webster's on line dictionary- a mythical animal usually represented as a monstrous winged and scaly serpent or saurian with a crested head and enormous claws. For many, Dragons have major spiritual significance. ''In many Asian cultures dragons were, and in some cultures still are, revered as representative of the primal forces of nature, religion and the universe. They are associated with wisdom—often said to be wiser than human…

Yes, 2012, from here –end of 2011- looks like it could offer a doorway to positive change.

Please do understand – I am grateful for the sun and the moon and the stars. I love that our Creator had given me my Love, my children, my boys, my friends –my life. But 2011, with all its goodness has been so filled with pain and the ache of loss…The ache of long term loss, the forever ache of the death of loved ones.

My aunt Ellen…she's gone and left a gaping hole in my heart and soul…and now Sara…mother of mine and so many others…She was taken, too – ripped from the earth and our lives in a violent storm of crashing metal and fire.

These two women--- as strong as they were and as loving and wise…they left us at the age of 64 and a few months…What did they know and why did they both choose to leave at this time? Were they as the rabbit – blinded by the soft fresh grass, the sunshine and the call of the birds? They did fall prey, each to her own tragic end. The year of the Rabbit; it is over.

For those of us for whom faith, facts and coincidences help us make sense out of the nonsense and grasp the impossible -Sixty four is: The maximum number of strokes in any Chinese character, the number of sexual positions in the Kama Sutra, the number of codons in the RNA codon table under genetic code, the number of crayons in the popular Crayola 64 pack, the number of demons in the Dictionnaire Infernal, in chess, the total number of black (dark) and white (light) squares on the game board, the atomic number of gadolinium, a lanthanide, and the name of a song by the Beatles.

For both my Aunt Ellen and Sara, it is the age that they will never live beyond. For them 65 does not exist.

I pray that for those of us they left behind, 2012 will be a year to live; A year to live? What do I mean by that?

They are gone. From both Ellen and Sara, there are lessons to learn about life and about death.  I do not believe that if Ellen was healthy she would have chosen to end her life at 64. But after looking at the possibilities, she did choose to end the fight and the struggle and the pain. She chose to die. She believed that her death was preferable to pain.

Sara – she definitely did not choose this time to die. For Sara, every day was an adventure and a thrill. Life was to be embraced and enjoyed – Each day to be lived as if it might be the last…And this is what Sara was doing up until the moment she was taken…

And this is what I will take from these two magnificent women-

v  To live life, each day as it is the last.

v  Not to struggle to survive, but live until it is time to go

v  To be kind and giving

v  To love and love some more

v  Enjoy health, body, mind and soul

v  See…the world has so much beauty

v  Love is to give and to receive

v  Do – until it is impossible to do more

v  Rest and get up and start again

The year of the Rabbit – passive and prey; it is over. And in this year, this year of the Dragon – I will be fearless and strong with the primal strength of the Dragon as my talisman. I will fly and try to channel their collective wisdom…and live. I pray to the Creator to show us all -especially those left in this puddle of tears- I pray for the strength, the wisdom and the faith of the Dragon.

**Drawing by my talented son, Ya'ir Preiss

Sara is gone

LesbosOnTheCouch by Beth C, one of the Lesbos

I am one of the luckiest people that I know. I have had many mothers throughout my life time --- and Sara was one of these. She was one – she was always one.

Sara was one. She was one and she was one and only in so many ways. I’ve know Sara and Avner for over 32 years. They adopted me in Syracuse while we were trying to study and learn and grow in the snowiest and coldest place I’d ever been.

From the very beginning they took me into their home, into their hearts. Sara sensed right away that something was missing in me – she sensed my need and she put herself out there, selflessly and wholly. She put herself to me fully and without hesitation. She was the first to hold me tightly and not let go – ever.

She was the first to teach me that I was loveable and worthy of love. She held me and no matter what I said and no matter what I did… she held me – and in many ways, she sustained me.

She talked to me openly and honestly. She was one of the first to open me up and give me safe haven. Their home in Syracuse became mine, their boys became my brothers. In Syracuse, every holiday, every event, every birthday and celebration, I was included…I was included, I was surrounded, I was engulfed and I was loved as I was an unconditionally. Sara saw something in me that I didn’t yet see in myself.

I don’t know how or why she did it. She spent so much time with me, helping to heal and become whole…She saved me from myself more times than I care to remember… – she saved me from so much, most of which she did not even know, -or care… What I had done, what had happened to me – this was only important to her, because it was important to me…but she taught me, she tried to teach me, that I was more than my past. I was more than my pain.

This is the Sara that I have been so very blessed to have known. This woman, a true mother of the earth…Sara was warm and alive. She taught me what it meant to be a mother first hand…she talked to me about things that no one else dared or bothered to speak of. Sara was the first to accept and understand –everything…she ‘got it’ all.

Sara was fearless in every way. She was fearless in the way she lived, in the way she loved and in the way she expressed herself. She was not afraid. She knew that life is a gift. She knew that time is precious. Sara did not believe that time spent giving and loving and talking was wasted time. All time spent, a gift… and this gift she shared with me in a way that can only dream of understanding. Share was fearless. Share was generous. Sara was warm and loving. Sara treasured life. I consider myself to have been so luck – so blessed. Sara shared with me her most treasured gifts – her family, her love and her time---her time cut short.

I believe that we are better people for having known Sara…and now…

Sara has left us. It is impossible to grasp. Sara – fearless, loving and strong and bold is no longer here to share and be.

Blessed be Sara in death as she was in life.